I was 3 years old, this is my second earliest memory of my life.
I was sat in the back off my mothers seven seater Nissan Serena, a big red minibus the government had supplied to us as my eldest brother Shane is autistic & completely blind. In the car there was my mum Lorna driving, my brother Shane in the passenger seat, my brother Elliot, and my sisters Carly and Mauritia (pronounced more-risha) in the back, and myself in the very back seats. As the car trundled down the road I distinctly remember the atmosphere changing as we turned onto the building site which was the new build housing estate where we was moving to. The atmosphere changed but no one reacted except me.
You see, My names Professor Jesse Hawkins, and I’ve have been a psychic medium my entire life. It all began in a house in Clacton-on-sea. built on a historic burial ground, which housed a morgue, it was then covered with a horse racing track which was left to go derelict before a housing development built an estate on top in 1997. I lived in 18 Cattermole close most of my childhood before my mother bought the house from the council and rented it out, I stayed whilst my family moved out and my now wife moved in with me at 16 years old, we eventually moved to Colchester when our family grew but the house is still owned by my mum to this day.
Back to when I was 3, I caught my first glimpse of the house that I unknowingly developed into a psychic medium in. It stood there, a massive red brick semi-detached 4 bedroom house. As my huge family piled out of the minibus, we was greeted by a stuck-up prick from the housing association. He clearly looked down his nose at us and made no effort to hide it as he showed us around our new home.
We left and my memory snaps to moving day. Every day was fun and chaotic for my family growing up, But today was especially mad as my family unloaded our entire lives from several extended family members cars. I was ordered to keep out the way as my older siblings rushed around, blindly carrying boxes and bags to there right rooms. The place I choose to keep out of the way was the top of the stairs. Thinking back now, i was probably right in the way there but I was the baby, and no one moved me.
As I sat there kicking the back of my heels against the top stair over and over, I was taking in the smells of everything new, the new carpet, the cut wood and unpacked kitchen, have you noticed that smell everything new has? It’s addictive right?
I can only assume that my boredom and deep breathing to inhale the smell must have calmed me down into a spiritually vulnerable state, because the next thing I know, an elderly lady had sat next to me, and introduced herself. “Hello m‘love, my name is rose. I know your name, it’s Jess isnt it” she said whilst making direct eye contact with me. I remember that because no one ever pays serious attention whilst talking to a toddler let alone make eye contact for such a long time. Rose has called me m’love my whole life, and I notice that I subconsciously incorporate it into my psychic readings now. I wish I could explain how it felt but, and ask ever other psychic, it’s impossible to explain this feeling, it has no words, just worn out cliches... it felt safe, familiar, different but yet normal. I felt I had more of a connection with rose, than I did with any of my family at that point.
I sat there with Rose, looking back I must have bored her with my toddler talk... “my names Jess”, “I’m 3”, “look at my shoes”, “what’s your name” you know how it is guys, the endless toddler statements and questions.
Not one single member of my family clocked me talking to myself at the top of the stairs. They just bustled past all fun... and chaotic.
That’s my second earliest spiritual memory. My first was an Astro travelling dream , but thats for a different post.
Rose come back time and time again, I spent so much time with her in my childhood, she practically raised me. In hindsight im Puzzled as to why I never thought to question why a random old lady kept appearing in my house to talk to me, and introduce me to her “friends” in my home. I don’t know... childhood innocence am I right?
So the first time i innocently mentioned Rose to my family, we ALWAYS sat down to dinner together, we didn’t really have mobile phones back then but I remember Elliot and Carly had one as they are 10 years older than me. The was NOT brought to the dinner table.
I was sat there, munching into my fish fingers and beans, a meal my spoilt sister Mauritia insisted upon every damn day, when I was saying something about squibbling (colouring) with rose... I remember so clearly the “awwwws” and adoring looks from my family as they dismissed her as an imaginary friend. I guess I did to, none of my family acknowledged her, she didn’t interact with anyone else but me and her “friends” she bought along sometimes, she wasn’t constantly around like my family.
I was so young I didn’t even know the word psychic let alone what it meant. My family are firm non-believers so it wasnt a conversation topic either. I just had an old lady friend who I didn’t quite understand but loved being around.
She would pop up all the time, especially at night, or when I was hurt or emotional. Sometimes when I was alone and in my own imagination (which was most of the time, my mum was a single working mum, and my siblings are all a lot older than me) Rose would bring my attention back from daydrmeaning... sometimes just to chat, other times to take me somewhere, which I now know was various Spirit planes, or sometimes she would introduce me to her friends, other spirits.
Rose raised me into a psychic and I wasn’t even aware of it. I met countless other spirits, mostly fleeting conversations, sometimes they didnt even say anything.
I wasn’t the brightest teenager, I struggled at school and ended up being kicked out and going to a naughty boys school. I didn’t understand fully that I was psychic until was 15, I had suspected but i just laughed it off. I was 15 and had lied about my age to get a hairdressing apprenticeship, I had met Jamie and we pretty much had our first son instantly. It was the first opportunity i could blag to earn money for my young family.
It was a crappy salon in clacton run by two gay guys who had separated... you can imagine the atmosphere in there right? One of them had taken a shine to me and we basically spent most the time smoking out the back whilst the other one ran the shop, but I was getting paid £100 a week to do so, so I was happy.
The one who fancied me was a psychic and it was the first time this subject had come into my life... he was explain some psychic activity which had happen to him, it had stuck in my mind and I didnt know why, I pondered on it for a few hours before the penny dropped. HANG ON.... that happens to me all the time.
I told him him and he took me under his wing, surprise surprise, I think he just wanted to spend time with me alone. I remember cringing at his leechy comments and avoiding any topics about relationships and sex at all costs, but I was learning!!!
I was learning what was happening to me, and how to control it, and about all the different ways to communicate like tarot, and boards etc. And for that I shall always be grateful to that sketchy pervert!
and that guys... is how my psychic journey started. I hope you enjoyed that guys. Please comment and like and keep an eye out for my next chapter, we haven’t even tipped the iceberg, I’ve been a psychic for 25 years and I have a shit ton of mad stories to tell!